Gay in America

In 1973 the APA did away with homosexuality as a mental disorder. The change wasn't easy, but the weight of the scientific evidence suggested that same-sex attraction was a normal variant of sexuality among well-adjusted people. Today, you can hardly open a paper or turn on the news that you aren't hearing some new horror show about gays in America - from teens being bullied to suicide to states denying civil liberties to same sex couples. I'm often mortified because I grew up knowing that some people are gay - in fact, both of my uncles were homosexual. I never occurred to me as a child that there was anything wrong with that. I called their partners 'uncle,' too. It seemed like the most natural thing in the world.

I didn't realize until I was an adult, the price that every gay man or woman must pay to live in our society. And although I have gay people in my life who have found a measure of happiness; who have found someone to love and were lucky enough to have an accepting and loving family, even these people bear the scars of being different in a culture that grows less and less accepting of anything but some idealized 'normal' (which seems to me to be white, male, straight and Protestant.) I watched a beloved uncle die of AIDS back in the day where it was referred to as "the gay plague" and watched nurses refuse to touch him because of their ignorance. I watched another struggle with his faith, a faith that denied who he was and labeled him a 'sinner' for loving the people that he loved. He lived a monogamous life for nearly 25 years with the same partner, but could never be married. He is a veteran (both of my gay uncles served their country... imagine that,) and lives with bi-polar disorder. I know of two (thankfully) unsuccessful suicide attempts.

In my opinion, every human being is the result of a nearly infinite number of variables. Many of these variables are visible to us in our lifetimes - where we were born and to whom, our social situation and nationality, our training into that society and into spirituality, and all the things we experience from our birth to where we are now. Perhaps we can decipher some of these variables, although I suspect that many people never feel the need to. In addition, we consist of innumerable amounts of genetic code; codes that give us our gender and the color of our eyes and skin, our height and body type, even five fingers and toes. But there are codes for every possible variation in the human being and scientists have only scratched the surface of these. Some codes make people susceptible to disease, or unable to moderate their mood, and yes, I do believe that some people are genetically homosexual. With all that infinite variety, from completely straight to completely gay, and every variation in the middle of that, human sexuality simply is. We are sexual beings. It shouldn't be a big thing.

Statistically, twenty percent of the human population is gay. Always have been. Always will be. I've always thought of it as a type of natural birth control. Some of those gay people have brain disorders, some have hemophilia, heart disease or diabetes, some will stay in the closet, some will become activists and fight for their basic rights. In the end, all of them are simply human beings and as such are entitled to basic human rights and basic human dignity. And as such they want what we all want, to be loved... and to live without fear.

10 Tips to Manage Your Scattered Brain

Let’s start right away. I want to eliminate anything that can distract you from finishing this post.

• Do you feel like you want to do a million and one things this instant?
• Do you lack the ability or desire to stay with your task till you complete it, including the simplest of tasks?
• Do you feel unmotivated to start on something that you really want to accomplish?
• Are you easily distracted and everything in the entire world seems more interesting than what you’re doing?
• Are there things you need to do that remain undone because there is no outside pressure/deadline to force completion?

If you answered yes to any or all of the above questions then you are a scattered brainer. Welcome to the club . There is nothing wrong with being distracted every now and then, or not even getting anything done. But when it becomes a constant in your daily life, you can fall into a stressful trap of avoidance, or worse, trying to catch up and make up for lost time.

I have been implementing the tips below to deal with my scattered brain. I’m slowly regaining my focus and brain power. Hope you find these tips useful. Try to work with as many of them as you can.

1. Know what you want to do and prioritize.

This is the most obvious and probably one that is listed in every productivity book and article out there. The importance of this step cannot be overstated.

If you don’t know what you want and stuff is just floating in your head, you’ll never get the satisfaction of doing anything. So yes make a list of everything that is on your mind. Then Prioritize—with a capital P. This is where you get to tell your brain to stop fretting about the small stuff and focus on what is really important.

2. Break it down and keep it simple.

Once you have your list and you determine your top two or three tasks, choose one to start with and break it down to the simplest form of action. Every step should not take more than 15 to 30 minutes to complete. If it takes longer, break it down further.

The smaller the task, the less time it takes to get done, the more you’re likely to stick with it. This is a good way to tell your brain to just stay with it for 15 minutes.

3. Start and do it slowly—one task at a time.

Don’t try to speed thing up in an effort to save time. This triggers your brain to drift to what you want to do next instead of what you’re doing right now. Your brain can focus on one thought at a time, so make it about what is right in front of you. Do things slowly and deliberately. You will feel much better once you complete your task.

4. Take breaks.

Don’t be tempted to work nonstop for hours on end. This will lead to burn out and you won’t have enough motivation to start again.

After completing a 15-30 minute task, take a break and do something fun. You can stretch, move, read an article or whatever you feel like doing. Just don’t take too long. I would suggest 5-10 minutes.

Once you complete 4 tasks, take a longer break—an hour or so. This is your free time to do whatever you like—guilt free.

5. Learn to focus.

If you want to have laser sharp focus, you need to learn how to meditate and do it.

Meditation is becoming more mainstream now and is really easy to do. You don’t need to spend an hour. Start with a few minutes and move up to 15 – 30 minutes. Do a search and pick a breathing or mantra meditation. The most important thing is to train your brain to relax, and focus on one thing (the mantra or your breath).

6. Ditch your clock/watch. Work in intervals.

Forget about the clock and don’t obsess over time. It doesn’t matter when you start working on something. Use a timer and set it to the estimated time to complete your task (an interval of no more than 30 minutes). Start the timer and go for it. Don’t stop until your time is up. Take a break and repeat.

Focus on working and getting your tasks done, regardless of what time it is. This way you are guaranteed to work instead of finding excuses to postpone things till tomorrow, when you can work on them bright and early.

7. Don’t do anything else until your interval is done.

Don’t do anything else while your timer is running for a specific task. If it is something that requires inspiration (like writing) and you can’t seem to find any, just sit still and think about the task until your time is up.

Don’t be tempted to do something else because you can’t seem to get started on the task at hand. Sooner or later inspiration will come—you’ll be surprised by how effective five minutes of silence can be in sparking your genius.

8. Keep going.

If you fall off the wagon, just pick up and start again. There is no reason for you to give up. Review what you did and what went wrong, learn from it and move on to your next task or interval.

Remember: practice makes improvement.

9. Power down and reboot.

Give yourself free days to enjoy yourself away from tasks and to do’s. Keep it free and don’t commit to anything new. This is a time for you to relax, have fun and spend time with your loved ones.

Use your off days to unwind and empty your mental cache. Don’t try to squeeze in anything else. After a break, you’ll feel energized and motivated to get back to your tasks.

10. Make it fun.

Embrace your playful inner child and use your imagination to make the best out of every task. Even the most mundane thing can be fun and entertaining.

When you are working on a task, imagine that someone is watching you and commenting on how brilliantly you’re working. Or that you are trying to set a world record, or break your own. You can have a conversation with yourself as you work … you get the picture.

Your results depend on where you choose to put your focus and energy. So do what gives you the most effective results in the most enjoyable manner. Once you get going and you keep going, there is no turning back—things get easier and you start harnessing more of your mental power.

Ed. note: snagged this from One With Now.

It Gets Better

Should You Disclose Depression To Your Employer?

"If I had diabetes I would probably tell my company," Sandy says. "But I've never told them this." By "this," she means the fact that she suffers from depression. Today, CNN tackles a huge question: If you're suffering from depression, should you let people at your job know?

As the piece by Health.com's Anne Harding points out, happy employees are productive employees. So it's in a company's best interests to make sure workers get what they need to be healthy — mentally and physically. The problem, of course, is that a stigma surrounds mental illness.

Depending on the atmosphere and environment you work in, disclosing depression (or bipolar disorder, or any kind of mental illness) can seem like asking for trouble. Your coworkers may see it as an excuse; your boss may think of you as weak, and you might even be the subject of gossip. Of course, this shouldn't be the case. But who hasn't worked at a company where acting human — instead of like a cog in the machine — was viewed as a flaw? Any kind of personal issues were frowned upon; nothing mattered except the work.

The thing is: The more people admit to depression and other mental illnesses, the faster these conditions would lose some of the stigma. And if your job is part of what's making you depressed, well, at least take comfort in knowing we've all been there.

Depression In The Workplace: Don't Ask, Don't Tell? [CNN]

Read more: http://jezebel.com/5642864/should-you-disclose-depression-to-your-employer?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+jezebel%2Ffull+%28Jezebel%29#ixzz10EoE3c7h

Top 10 Controversial Psychiatric Disorders -Part 2

8. Narcissistic Personality Disorder - Someone with an inflated ego, need for constant praise and lack of empathy for others might sound like a shoe-in for psychotherapy. But the introduction of narcissistic personality disorder into the DSM in 1980 was not without controversy. The biggest problem was that no one could agree on who had the disorder. Up to half of people diagnosed with a narcissistic personality also met the criteria for other personality disorders, like histrionic personality disorder or borderline personality disorder, according to a 2001 review in the Journal of Mental Health Counseling. Which diagnosis they got seemed almost arbitrary. To solve the problem, the American Psychiatric Association has proposed big changes to the personality disorder section of the DSM-5 in 2010. The new edition would move away from specific personality disorders to a system of dysfunctional types and traits. The idea, according to the APA, is to cut out the overlap and create categories that would be useful for patients who have personality problems, not just full-blown disorders.

7. Dissociative Identity Disorder - Once known as multiple personality disorder, dissociative identity disorder was made famous by the book "Sybil" (Independent Pub Group, 1973), which was made into a movie of the same name in 1976. The film and book told the story of Shirley Mason, pseudonym Sybil, who was diagnosed as having 16 separate personalities as a result of physical and sexual abuse by her mother. The book and the movie were hits, but the diagnosis soon came under fire. In 1995, psychiatrist Herbert Spiegel, who consulted on Mason's case, told the "New York Review of Books" that he believed Mason's "personalities" were created by her therapist, who -- perhaps unwittingly -- suggested that Mason's different emotional states were distinct personalities with names. Likewise, critics of the dissociative identity diagnosis argue that the disorder is artificial, perpetuated by well-meaning therapists who convince troubled and suggestible patients that their problems are due to multiple personalities. Nonetheless, dissociative identity disorder has weathered this criticism and won't undergo any major changes in the DSM-5. (ed. note - Having met someone who underwent extensive therapy and reached recovery with this diagnosis, I'm having trouble believing it doesn't exist... it may be rare, but I think it's real.)

From an article by Stephanie Pappas. First installment here.

Top 10 Controversial Psychiatric Disorders -Part 1

The proposed revisions of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) have spurred debate over what illnesses to include in the essential psychiatric handbook. Everything from gender identity disorder to childhood mood swings has come under fire, and it's not the first time. The history of psychiatry is littered with impassioned fights over controversial diagnoses.

10. Hysteria -In the Victorian era, hysteria was a catch-all diagnosis for women in distress. The symptoms were vague (discontentment, weakness, outbursts of emotion, nerves) and the history sexist (Plato blamed the wanderings of an "unfruitful" uterus). The treatment for hysteria? "Hysterical paroxysm," also known as orgasm. Physicians would massage their patients' genitals either manually or with a vibrator, a task they found tedious but surprisingly uncontroversial. More contentious was the practice of putting "hysterical" women on bed rest or demanding that they not work or socialize, a treatment that often worsened anxiety or depression.According to a 2002 editorial in the journal Spinal Cord, the diagnosis of hysteria gradually petered out throughout the 20th century. By 1980, hysteria disappeared from the DSM in favor of newer diagnoses like conversion and dissociative disorders.

9. Penis Envy - Sigmund Freud revolutionized psychiatry in the late 1800s and early 1900s with his theories on the unconscious state, talk therapy and psychosexual development. Nowadays, many of these theories -- like his conclusion that young girls' sexual development is driven by jealousy over lack of a penis and sexual desire for their father -- seem outdated. But not everyone has consigned Freud to the dust heap. Organizations like the American Psychoanalytic Association still practice and promote Freudian-style psychoanalysis, and groups like the International Neuropsychoanalysis Society try to combine cutting-edge neuroscience research with Freud's century-old theories. How successful they'll be is unknown: A 2008 study in the Journal of the American Psychoanalytic Association found that today's psychology departments rarely teach psychoanalysis.

Ed. note: From an article by Stephanie Pappas on LiveScience.

10 Ways to Reduce Anxiety... Part 4

8. Breathe it out. You may notice that when your body is tense you hold your breath. Focusing on breathing is a common but effective technique for calming the nerves. Where is your breath now, and where is your mind? Bring them together. Listen to the movement of your breath. Does your mind wander somewhere else? Call it back. Concentrate only on breathing in and out, beginning and ending, breath to breath, moment to moment.

9. Make peace with time. When you're a worrier, everything can feel like an emergency. But notice this about all your anxious arousal: It's temporary. Every feeling of panic comes to an end, every concern eventually wears itself out, every so-called emergency seems to evaporate. Ask yourself, "How will I feel about this in a week or in a month?" This one, too, really will pass.

10. Don't let your worries stop you from living your life. Many of them will turn out to be false, and the consequences of your anxiety -- less sleep, a rapid pulse, a little embarrassment-- are just inconveniences when it comes down to it. What can you still do even if you feel anxious? Almost anything.

Ed. note: Part of an excellent series by Robert L. Leahy, PhD and director of the American Institute for Cognitive Therapy in NY, NY. See the first three installments here, here, and here.